Friday, July 17, 2009

Sugar, spice, and a side of snails...

"Why are you dressed like that?" I asked. And I wasn't referring to the fact that they looked like hoochie mamas. What I was really trying to get to the bottom of is why my SON was dressed like a GIRL.

"I'm teaching Waylon how to be a girl." Jamie explained. "Can we have some lipstick or nail polish to put in our purses?"

"No. Absolutely no makeup." I had to drawn the line somewhere.

"Okay." They said as Waylon sneakily grabbed something off of my vanity and headed for the door.

"You'd better not be sneaking makeup." I warned him.

"Sorry." He said with a sheepish grin, putting the stolen nail polish back where he had found it.

"Thank you for telling the truth honey. I'm very proud of you." I told him.

With pride of his own beaming forth he raced after Jamie and asked, "Hey Jamie, do girls do that? Do girls tell the truth?"

"Yes Waylon girls sometimes always tell the truth." She informed him. Then continuing her tutorship she explained to him that girls love to talk, "So we need to sit down on the couch and have a talk." she said.

"So," Waylon began, "have you ever seen a dead dog?"

"No Waylon." Jamie snapped in disgust, "Girls do not talk like that."

"Oh."

"And girls always sit with their legs crossed like this." Jamie modeled daintily.

Waylon sat copying her for a moment before announcing, "Yeah, but this squishes my penis a little."

Then after a picture and a request by Jamie to put it on my blog, "Girls always put things on their blogs." She explained. The two of them ran off to change for the "how to be a boy" portion of the evening.

I didn't catch as much of this conversation but I did learn, along with Jamie, that boys like to sit like this, that they always drink their sodas with no lid or straw, and when Jamie laughed too enthusiastically at one of his jokes Waylon informed her that, "No Jamie, boys do not laugh as much as girls do."

It wasn't until I learned from one of my older kids that Waylon was upstairs smashing one of my baskets because, "Boys like to break things" that I put a stop to their education and sent them to get ready for bed.

I'm constantly shaking my head with these two, but they do keep me laughing.


17 comments:

TheShumWAYS said...

Thanks for the laugh... oh they crack me up!

Marcie said...

That is one of the funniest stories I've ever heard!

Lene said...

H.i.l.a.r.i.o.u.s!

Is this what I should be watching for with my kidlets?

4boyzmdmom said...

Oh, that is so funny and cute! Love it! The photos are a scream--especially the one with both of them sitting like boys!

Momisodes said...

Oh my goodness. They are a riot, and so was this post! I had to share it with my hubby :)

Jessica said...

I like this! As one who once dresses up my babysitting charge in his sister's dress, and I myself once won the award for "Dress like a boy Day" amongst my roommates, this is a very entertaining post. Especially since Jamie requested you post it! Well, today my 4 yr old daughter & her cousin got into the nail polish by themselves. Well, they were accompanied by my 20 month old son who also wanted to paint his nails. So sweet. He wants to be like his sister.... And she asked for legos for her birthday!

Jessica said...

oh yes, I forgot to mention that I looooooove Waylon's reaction to crossing his legs. So honest and matter-of-fact!!!

♥Aubrey said...

Hahaha...this sooo hits home for me. My children both do this as well. Good for them to know the difference :)- I have a fab giveaway. Check it out!

hanna (kmcaldwell) said...

thank you for the laugh and tell them that i think they are good teachers!



hanna caldwell

oh yeah i took a button they are cute

Anonymous said...

My, I have such entertaining grandkids...I laughed until I cried. I have a pretty entertaining daughter too. You're great!

Jessica said...

My husband laughed. Multiple times. Then when he got to the end, he said "That's funny."

Sneaky Momma said...

Oh, this is way too funny! I love the girl/boy pics!!!! :)

The Cranes said...

So THAT'S why boys don't sit with their legs crossed! Truly hilarious post.

MaryRC said...

oh did we all have a laugh at these gender lessons.. LOL

Marrdy said...

Oh my gosh!!! I have got to follow your blog. I haven't had this good of a laugh in days!

Shellie said...

That was absolutely adorable! What fun!

Peterson Family said...

That's hilarious! It's a shame you couldn't sneak a video...that would be very educational!